Lots of Strange, and Disturbing IOU's
by Lam Baka
Summary: "I don't understand you and your demon friends. You're weird, they're weird. I'm weird, I guess," Dipper grumbled. "It was so hard, you know. With you being gone, and me having to repay everyone of those demons. I had to do so many summonings man, it's not even funny," the asterism pouted.


**Thank you altered-karma for daring me to do this! I chose to do #6, because why not. I was imagining #1 at first, buuuuut I thought #6 would be funnier. I don't know how to write this, oh my god.**

 **#6 was "You died and left me to repay a bunch of really weird IOU's."**

 **This is short and sweet. Because it can be :v**

 **…**

"I really hate you right now. You know that?" Dipper said once he made it to the statue of his dead boyfriend. He sat down in front of the triangular statue of Bill Cipher, his legs crossed. "I mean, yeah I still love you, and, I miss you, a lot.." Dipper trailed off, biting his lip for a moment before he continued. He didn't need to cry at the statue again. "But I hate you so much right now," the asterism sighed.

Dipper took off his cap, and placed it on top of Bill's stone top hat. "Boop," Dipper mumbled, poking Bill's eye. He sighed again. No reaction, as always.

Running a hand through his soft, brown locks, he looked back at Bill. "You know, after Weirdmaggedon, after you uhm.. Died, I had to repay a lot of really weird IOU's. And some of them were really creepy." Dipper thinned his lips, his brow furrowing as he dug into the back pocket of his baggy jeans, before pulling out slips of paper. A lot, of slips of paper.

"I mean, look at this!" The young man exclaimed, pointing at one of the slips of papers. "Why the hell did you owe Teeth a pair of freaking eyeballs drenched in maple syrup!?" He shouted, tossing the slip of paper. Dipper groaned, and rubbed his eyes. He fell back, back landing softly on the pile of multicolored leaves, arms spread out, and the side of his knees pressed against the sides of the statue.

"I don't understand you and your demon friends. You're weird, they're weird. I'm weird, I guess," Dipper grumbled. "It was so hard, you know. With you being gone, and me having to repay everyone of those demons. I had to do so many summonings man, it's not even funny," the asterism pouted.

Dipper stayed silent for a moment, his brow furrowed. "I'm not gonna ask why you owed Pyronica a pair of boots that were always on fire. I'm not even sure how I did that. As far as I know, the boots are still on fire."

Dipper lifted his head a bit, and stared at the statue. Still no reaction. No movement whatsoever. "I talked a lot with your friends. Well, our friends, I guess. I'm still repaying a lot of them, but sometimes we talk. None of them have seen you in the Nightmare Dimension, and we've all came to the conclusion that you were gone forever. Well, they did. I think you're still here. Somewhere. In your own.. Rotting dimension," Dipper sighed, closing his eyes.

"I don't understand. Understand why a statue of you was left over, why you owed so many demons all these things. I'm pretty sure 8-Ball got like, human feet with the toenails clipped off and a lot of thumbtacks in it." Dipper visibly shuddered, not liking the thought of that. "I threw up while doing that. And I became a murderer because of all these IOU's I had to repay for you. Like, really. Why did you even owe Hectorgon a dead, human body that was filled with stuffing?" Dipper grimaced, and gagged a little, clearly disgusted about it. "It was so nasty. Taking out all these organs and blood and just putting all that stuffin-" Dipper placed his hands over his mouth, his lunch coming up, threatening to escape his lips.

Swallowing down his bile, he groaned, and rubbed his forehead. "I hated doing that. I threw up so much.." He stayed silent for a few minutes.

"This was going against my morals so much. But I still did it. For you," he murmured. Dipper pressed the palms of his hands against his eyes, sighing softly. "I hate you, I love you, I hate that I love you," Dipper sang, not trying as it was obvious from how off key he was. "God that was terrible," he huffed. Dipper sat up, and rubbed his cheek, keep his legs outstretched and pressed close to Bill's statue.

"You know, Ford wanted to destroy this statue. He thinks that you're kind of.. Bonded to your grave." Dipper grimaced, face scrunching up. "He thought that if we destroyed it, you'd be gone forever. Clearly Ford didn't destroy it, curtesy of moi," Dipper cracked a grin, before visibly deflating. "I miss you a lot," he breathed.

Dipper swallowed loudly. "Uh, on a lighter note, I'm almost done with all these IOU's. So that's fun, I guess. I've been avoiding this one, where uh, you owed Keyhole a human corpse formed into a key. Yeeaaaah," Dipper gnawed on the inside of his cheek. "I'm really not looking forward to that, but I still gotta do it," he sighed. "God, you owe your friends a lot of weird stuff.."

Dipper grabbed his hat, and rubbed the pine tree in it. Pecking the blue tree on the hat, he placed it back on Bill's top hat. "I love you." Dipper smiled, but it was wavering, his voice strained. "Oh God I miss you so much," he sniffled, rubbing his watering eyes. Leaning foreword, he pressed a kiss on Bill's unblinking, cement eye. "I gotta go. Dinners gonna be soon. I'll leave all these," Dipper waved at all the slips of paper, "here. So you can laugh at all the things you owed your friends. I'll.. Catch you later."

Standing up, Dipper walking out of the clearing, turning his head around to stare at the statue. "I love you," he repeated, before leaving, quickly walking off.

"Fuck fuck fuck, don't cry," Dipper muttered angrily, rubbing furiously at his eyes. He always ended up crying whenever he visited Bill, no matter how much he tried not to. Sometimes a few tears here and there, other times he'd be sobbing for half an hour, maybe more. Depending on what he talked to Bill about.

Shaking his head, he tried to distract himself, but only succeeded in thinking about the next IOU he planned on working on.

Which, to his luck, was to just get Xanthar another party hat.

 **…**

 **Aaaaaaaand done. Not exactly long, but isn't too short either. I'm to lazy to edit/revise/preread this, plus I don't have a beta reader so. Haha. This is all I'm doing. I didn't know how to end this. I don't know what I did.**


End file.
